This is the piece I wrote a few years ago that I was referring to in my previous post. It was written on 2.25.07, just over 3 years ago. At the time, I titled it BEFORE & AFTER. Though now I view it as Chapters 1 & 2. Still to come... Chapter 3, Chapter free.

I AM:

honest 99% of the time

not impressed by ego or bravado

happier than I’ve ever been

single by *choice*

complex

...searching...

healing

hard on myself

disheartened by the state of the world

crestfallen by cruelty of any manner or degree

disappointed by a significant portion of society

endlessly encouraged by the rest

loving to a fault

the feeder that often goes hungry

full of creativity and compelled to manifest it

thankful to have survived my past

I WANT:

people to be less vain, and more honest

a utopian society

to find personal success

to live my dreams

to break free of the boundaries I feel harness me

to travel the world

to stop fearing letting others down, namely my parents.

to find a love, lover, companion, friend & ally.

to be understood

my generosity to be met, just 50% of the time.

to form a deeper connection to my spiritual self

to listen more and talk less

I DREAM:

of a nourished, sheltered, educated & peaceful world

of mothering a child

** BIG **

of people rising up to their true potential, myself included

of achieving something on my "I WANT” list

of money losing it’s value and humans having to reassess

*vividly*

of the end of religious war

of continuing to become a better version of myself

of what's to come. . .

I HAVE:

traveled a very rocky road.

punished myself a lifetime’s worth

become someone I'm extremely proud of

been unbelievably blessed

loved, lost, longed, learned, and loved again.

arrived, left and managed to stay very still

written a lot of poetry

chosen optimism as a way of life

lived a life divided into two distinct parts:

Before & After

Survived

Evolved

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ Become ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~